i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
