You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
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