Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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