I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize