just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
