shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
