So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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