Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(352): View more from Florida

Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...

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(440): View more from Ohio

He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.

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(406): View more from Montana

My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered

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(785): View more from Kansas

MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.

(207): View more from Maine

HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.

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(+41): View more from Switzerland

She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"

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(256): View more from Alabama

I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1

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(425): View more from Washington

OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!

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