called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Man, jail baloney is awful.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
