Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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