i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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