dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize
