careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
