is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
this just has baby written all over it
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Boobs are out for the taking
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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