I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Just pee around me
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
