I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
sarcasm needs its own font
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
