Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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