Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Well I just put wine in my tea
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
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