So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
