your thong is hanging out like whoa
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize