Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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