I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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