Ketchup is God's man juice
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize