You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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