wat bout pragnant strippers??
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
