I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
