Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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