i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize