Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
