I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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