I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
