I feel like I'm in dance class right now
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
why is half of my head shaved?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
