whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
third nipple confirmed
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
