it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
