I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
