First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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