I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
