Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Are we still banned from the library?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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