My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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