ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize