wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Randomize
