It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
