Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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