He kissed a someone with a penis
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
