Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
