did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize