Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize