I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize
