i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
We have so much sex to catch up on
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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