I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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