He is such a slut. More and more my type.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
