The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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